Here are some things I have learned to make my Holiday less stressful! Disclaimer: My Husband is Perfect. Now that I’ve got that out of the way, here we go!
-Men don’t like to be told what to do. (just in case you didn’t already know that!) They would much rather be ASKED. One little tip, say something like this: “Honey, Could you please get the Christmas Boxes down for me before you go to work today” or “Sweety, will you please take out the garbage on your way out?” Giving them a time line always helps out.
-Men DO NOT HAVE A CLUE that you might need help. I know that sounds like I’m not giving them any credit, I’m not. They really do not see things the way we do. We can look at the house and only see all the things that need to be done, they see nothing. We can look at the kids and know that they need a bath before bed, they see nothing. I am not kidding! You have to ask for help!!! Try saying it like this “I really need your help tonight, I’m on my last straw, it would help me out a TON if you could help the boys shower BEFORE BED tonight. Can you do that for me?”
-Learn about what makes your Husband feel loved and DO IT! Contrary to popular belief, not all men need to be touched to feel loved! 🙂 I would suggest reading, TOGETHER, “The Five Love Languages” and find out what your love language is. Everyone feels loved and appreciated in a different way, and if we don’t feel like we are appreciated and loved, we start to shut off.
-Give him a break! He needs some time to himself, and especially, time alone with you. Even if it’s a 5 min. ride in the car to rent a movie. Men feel a completely different kind of stress than us moms. They feel the need to provide and protect, and if they are having a hard time at work, they need to feel supported by you.
-Tell him what you need from him. If you spent the whole day cleaning the house and he walks in and says nothing, DON’T GO OFF AND POUT! Say “Hey, I spent the whole day cleaning, how does it look?” or “I spent the whole day cleaning, and I NEED YOU TO NOTICE IT” with a huge cheesy grin on your face. Same goes for noticing your new hair cut.
Seriously, go get the book! Hopefully you can learn a lot about each other and learn how to make each other feel appreciated and loved.
http://www.fivelovelanguages.com/
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